From the English Channel to the Birth Room: A Humble Reflection on Facing the Unknown
- Deniz Kayadelen
- Jul 30
- 4 min read
When I swam across the English Channel — a 15-hour journey through cold, dark, and unpredictable waters — I thought I had experienced the edge of human endurance.
Now, in my 32nd week of pregnancy, I find myself approaching another vast unknown: giving birth.
And while I haven’t yet experienced birth myself, something in my body — and in my heart — tells me there are powerful parallels. This is not a guide. It’s not a “how-to.” It’s simply my humble reflection, as an athlete, woman, and human being navigating the threshold of transformation.
Because both journeys — swimming the Channel and bringing life into the world — demand trust in the unknown, surrender of control, and deep inner strength.
And perhaps more importantly:
These experiences mirror any moment in life when we are called to cross a threshold, take a leap, or let go of certainty.
Whether you’re changing careers, starting a business, healing from heartbreak, becoming a parent, moving countries, or simply saying yes to a long-held dream — I hope these reflections resonate with you too.
1. You don’t decide when it starts — the journey chooses you.
When I prepared for the English Channel, I had to be ready around the clock. The exact start time depended on tides, weather, and the pilot’s call. At 2:00 a.m., in complete darkness, I got the signal: It’s time.
Now, waiting to give birth, I feel the same tension and readiness. There’s no calendar invite for labor. It could begin in the middle of the night or on a quiet morning walk. The timing isn’t mine to choose.
Lesson: You don’t control the start — but you can choose how you show up.
2. The path you plan is rarely the path you take.
The English Channel is about 33–42 km in a straight line. But due to high tides and strong currents, I swam 57 km. My body didn’t fail — the environment shifted. Nature had her own course.
In birth, I hear similar stories. Some labors are short, others long. Some go as envisioned, others become full of surprises. In business, relationships, and life too — we make plans… and then life makes other ones.
Lesson: The path may twist and stretch — but your resilience can stretch further.
3. Time becomes irrelevant — presence becomes everything.
During my swim, I lost all sense of time. I wasn’t counting hours. I was counting breaths. Movements. Strokes. I planned for 11–14 hours. It took 15. But in the end, time was just a number. What mattered was not stopping.
Whether it’s labor, launching a business, or chasing a dream — the hours and setbacks blur. What keeps us going is presence. One breath, one choice, one small victory at a time.
Lesson: Success doesn’t live on a schedule — it lives in your ability to stay present.
4. Every emotion will visit you — let them flow.
In the Channel, I cried underwater. I laughed mid-swim. I felt fear, frustration, bliss, and total stillness. The emotional rollercoaster was real — and beautiful.
As I prepare to give birth, I feel waves of anticipation, fear, excitement, and deep tenderness. And I know this isn’t just about birth — it’s the same with any real transformation.
Lesson: Feel it all. Emotions are not obstacles — they are part of your strength.
5. You need a support team — but the breakthrough is yours to make.
No one swam the Channel for me — but I wasn’t alone. I had a support boat, my coach, my team. They cheered. They fed me. They kept me safe.
In birth, I will be surrounded too. A midwife. A partner. But only I can do the work of birth. And the same is true for any big leap. We can — and should — ask for support. But no one else can cross the threshold for us.
Lesson: You are the one in the water — but you don’t need to swim alone.
A Reflection from the In-Between
This blog isn’t a look back from the finish line.
It’s written from the middle — from the waiting.
From the not-yet.
From a woman still swimming, still growing, still transforming.
I don’t know how my birth journey will unfold.
I don’t know how I’ll feel in the final hour.
But I do know this: I trust my body. I trust the process. I trust that every great transformation starts with uncertainty.
And Maybe You’re Facing Your Own “Channel”
You don’t need to be giving birth or swimming through freezing water to relate.
Maybe you’re in the middle of a life transition.
Maybe you’re scared to start.
Maybe you’re grieving something that didn’t go as planned.
And maybe you, too, are standing on the edge of something powerful and unknown.
If that’s you, I hope this reminds you:
You don’t need to be fearless. You just need to keep breathing.
You don’t need to know the whole way. You just need to take the next step.
You don’t need to do it alone. But you’re stronger than you think.
From the English Channel to the birth room — and every leap of faith in between — I’ve learned:
Everything you’re looking for begins on the other side of certainty.
And the only way is through.
Want to go deeper?
I created a coaching booklet to help you unlock your Peak Flow — mentally and physically. Get it here
You can also book a free 1:1 coaching clarity call with me — no pressure, just presence, purpose, and a plan. Book your FREE session here
Watch or listen to my podcast “Out of Comfort Zone” on Spotify and YouTube, where I dive into stories of resilience, flow, and peak performance.
And if you haven’t yet read my bestselling book Out of Comfort Zone, you can get your copy here — filled with tools and stories to help you step into your highest potential.
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